He might be dead, but he’ll always be the guy who has just as many jokes as Chuck Norris. Here are some Michael Jackson jokes with a sickening death twist to coincide with his sudden death at the age of 50.
He touched many of us (literally)
Feel free to share your disgust, hate, laughter and Michael Jackson jokes in the comments. It’s okay, Michael won’t mind what you say – he’s dead.
What’s white, stiff and cold?
Michael Jackson’s corpse.
How many Michael Jackson’s does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Zero. Michael Jackson is dead.
How Does Michael Jackson Pick His Nose?
From a catalogue.
What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag?
Plastic Bags don’t die.
So.. Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Oh, wait…
What time does Michael Jackson go to bed?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
Why did Michael Jackson stop breathing?
His nose fell off.
Why does Michael Jackson like 28 year olds?
Because he’s dead.
What do Michael Jackson and the so-called weapons of mass destruction in Iraq share in common?
They both don’t exist.
Michael Jackson is so dead that he hasn’t been this stiff since McCauley Caulkin slept over at Never land Ranch.
Why did Michael Jackson convert to Islam on his deathbed?
He heard he would be greeted in heaven by seventy two year old virgins.
What were Michael Jackson’s last words before he died?
I’m coming baby Jesus!
So… It looks like Michael Jackson was finally arrested
Cardiac arrested!
Why did Michael Jackson cross the road?
To get to the other little boy.
What’s the difference between Steve Irwin and Michael Jackson?
Nothing. They’re both dead.
After hearing Michael Jackson had died, Madeleine McCann has finally come out of hiding.
Disney expressed their sadness over Michael Jackson’s death, and also celebrated that now only Disney movie’s will be the only things to touch children.
What’s the difference between Michael Jackson’s corpse and a trampoline?
When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.
What was Michael Jackson’s last hit?
The floor.
Popularity: 1% [?]
What does the 1969 moon landing and Michael Jackson nose have in common? They were both fake.
The saddest thing about Michael Jackson’s death is we’ve lost the biggest joke of the 20th and 21st century.
fuck you mj is the king
When Fara Fawcett died, God asked her what her 1 wish was…She reply’s”To make sure all the children are safe!” 4 days later michael jackson died.
i suck at trash
he has never molested a kid. Michael Jackson was a kid himself trapped in an adult body. He built Neverland for kids to have fun.he loves kids.He never really had a childhood.You can’t always believe what you hear.the boy he supposedly have done that to admitted that it never happend his dad put him up to doing that for the money
as for the thing you said thats bullshit! go on and continue with your life and stop making fun of a dead man who was well better and well known than you! you are all assholes!
Michael jackson haters are 10% of the world
Michael jackson lovers are 90% of the world
SOOOOOO give up you idiots
MichaelJacksonLover, do you realize how funny your name is? By the way, MJ hasn’t put out a good song since he was around 9 years old.
samuel
i dont have the time to swear at you so just fuck off
Oh god MJLover. Guys, I’ve gotta call troll. Someones playing. Nobody could be that fundametally stupid and not have become a victim of natural selection. It’s a regular dude pretending to be that stupid. If he is for real, I’m seriously questioning humans as the most advaned primate.
“I don’t have to to SWEAR at you so just FUCK OFF.”
^ I’m still laughing, oh my god.
MICHAEL JACKSON SUCKS LITTLY BOY DICKS!!!! HE’S A FUCKIN PEDOPHILE WHO DIED OF MEDICATION!!! HE’S A FUCKIN RETARD!! EMINEM’S RIGHT ABOUT THAT LITTLE “BLACK” PRICK!!! FUCK YOU AND FUCK HIM TO HELL!!!
I’m glad he’s dead. Even if he wasn’t a pedophile, only true human shit would dangle their infant child from a balcony. Don’t try to justify it, he could have made a statement to the press without almost killing his own child.
Fuck Michael Jackson and fuck anyone stupid enough to like him.
i haven’t lol’d this hard since chuck norris or steve irwin haha 20 internets to all joker rofl
*all jokes i cant spell for shit today lol XD
Neither will the kids he molested, lol
Your are a big ass hole, Micheal Jackson is still alive in our heart, He will never go from our heart till our death. So just Fuck your hole of mouth somewhere else with your pathetic jokes..!
Steve,
All I have to say to you, is GET FUCKED and I hope you die.
Careful, assuming Steve is a 5 year old boy, telling him to get fucked might get the ghost of MJ excited.
Hit them (kids) before the teeth do
ahh only if child molestation wasnt wrong in china
this is sad but i cant stop laughing!!! roffl!
I really miss Michael Jackson. He is truly the greatest pop singer of the century. Farewell king of pop..
MJ IS KING!
Slightly off the subject maybe, but a request for you to think about the ethics of buying cheap trampolines. Do try and think about, for example, the things the item is made with, the conditions of the employees where they’re manufactured and the ethics of the retailer. And try to recycle your trampoline rather than discarding. Thanks!!!!
these jokes are fails! haha you cant make up jokes for shit
there is no doubt that Michael Jackson is the best ever pop music artist of the Centruy”‘`
i will really miss the King of Pop. michael jackson is truly the best pop artist in this lifetime.;-:
u all suk for saying stuff abt michael jackson, i dont belev he touched little kids, and EVEN IF HE DID, wut makes him diferent from the rest??? i mean, there are thousands of child molestors, and i dont ever see a website for jokes abt them, ppl act like he is the worst guy in the world wen he is no betr than other molestors, again this is all IF HE WUZ GUILTY WICH HE IZNT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and u suk at jokes dude……………
jacko is a faggot
hi,really great Ipad,do you know where i can find that fantastic.thanks,Vox
Fuck you haters…Leave my KING ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
all u mj haters will rot in hell i don’t even get angry when i read u haters bullshit anymore u ppl are jus so fed up tht u all suck dick and tht michael was a much greater and more gifted person than u assholes could or will ever be look at urselves before u judge someone else and take the time to SEE how he grew up.
What did Michael Jackson say when he molested the little boy? You know I’m Bad, I’m bad.
Here’s another one. What did the boy say to Jackoff when he asked about molestation? Bad is the way you make me feel.
all of you are fucking faggots talking crap about michael. hes dead let him R.I.P fucking cunts
“Common point of MJ defenders? They don’t seem to know grammar or punctuation. Cerebral dysfunction at work.”
Madeline and myself say “hi”.
GOODNIGHT, SWEET PRINCE
frankly im shocked. all these months and nobody even thought of posting that line? for a website full of 13-year-old trolls im honestly disappointed at you guys.
some jokes i loled at though tbh therr not so good, its not fair makin fun of a dead person, wait until your dead ill make fun of use!
well guys I’ve a confession to make, my dad had once dangle with my ballsack once while licking me in the ears and mouth multiple times and yes people this is the real prince michael alright!! And this is my first time being online so yeah i’am glad my dad died cause I had bad experience about him doing those things to me when I was 8 years old
You people are really stupid. I never liked Michael Jackson, but everyone else in the world seems to, so there’s definatly nothing wrong with him. How is it that like, four billion people like him, and mabye…A billion (?) people don’t like him? He’s obviously doing something right. Half of the kids on this website don’t even know shit about him; they just think they’re cool by saying something bad about him that makes no sense. Mabye because when they were little, they decided to listen to their stupid friends, and just assume that he was a horrible person that molested little boys, and did all this shit. Eitther way, if when he went on trial for everything he did, and they found him innocent, then most likely he IS innocent.
If Michael Jackson was never born, the world would be a lot different, and he made a lot of progress in the music industry, so everyone with the bad comments just needs to shut the fuck up. Really.
I’m not saying he’s never done anything wrong, but he still was a good person, and he’s done a lot more good in the world, then bad.
By the way, these jokes are dumb too. They’re not funny, and the person who made them should feel dumb. :/
And also, if you guys are going to write something, try to have good spelling, and grammar atleast. Prince Michael, “my dad had once dangle with my ballsack once…” That makes no sence at all. You people are really dumb, because none of you can spell.
Probably Sucks…idk wat ur problem is but u kinda need 2 stop sayin dis shit nd get a life
nd ps..NO1 GIVES A FUCK WAT U SAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! CALL ME A BITCH ND A WHORE ND N E OTHER NAME U CAN THINK OF…I REALLY DONT CARE -_-…ASSHOLE